Deep Inside

Hey guys!

My goal of 5 page views was absolutely smashed! So far, I've got 36 page views! I'm really proud of myself. On another note, my exams start tomorrow and they stop next Friday and even though I'm feeling a lot better about them now then I was a couple of weeks ago, I'm still slightly worried. I'm more confident that I'll do alright and I'm not worried about doing badly but I can't help but feel the pressure.

In my drama class at school, we're studying a new topic of absurd theatre where the characters are really abstract and none of their lines or movements make sense to anyone. The main themes explored in this style is the meaning of simple things such as why there are 7 days in a week, or why the world turns and why life exists. I'm really enjoying this topic because it's sort of like my mind in a play. I'm really weird like that and I have a lot of questions that are similar to these. For instance, I've always found it hard to understand why mosquitoes and those gross little millipede things exist. As far as I'm aware, nothing eats them as their main source of food and they don't produce any important stuff like honey or fertiliser so why do they exist? Maybe I'm just being silly and they actually play a massive part in the world and I just haven't figured it out yet.

Anyway, with this new drama topic and the stress of exams, I'm starting to question my meaning. I like to think that everything happens for a reason and during my time on this Earth, I'm going to accomplish something that will change the world in some shape or form. For a while now, I've also thought about questions like whether my life is somehow different to other peoples. For all I know, you reading this could be an alien or robot made to make me think I'm normal. Maybe my life is like a story and I believe that I am a normal human being and I become the most famous person in the world and all along, I live my life like a normal person. Couldn't that be true though? Think about it. You don't know who I am and this could just be written by a robot. You could have stumbled across this post for a reason and its going to tell you something very important or change your mind on something. Whatever that is, I don't know. Maybe whenever you look at someone new, you'll think about what I've just written and question their meaning like I do. If you're a real human that is...

But that brings me back to my main point. What is the point of stressing over exams that are potentially meaningless? Why bother working? Why does life even exist? Why am I writing this when for all I know, no humans will actually read it?

That's the kind of random, crazy person I am deep inside.

Maybe everyone's like that though?

Maybe I'll never find out.

xx Teen Blog

Future Ambitions?

Hey!

Although no one has read my blog yet whatsoever I don't really mind. And frankly, I'm not surprised. Obviously I really want this blog to take off but I haven't really tried to get my name out there yet. I'm hoping that in a couple of weeks, I'll have at least 5 page views... well, that's my goal anyway.

 

I think its really good to have goals and to work towards things. At the moment, my current goal is to work towards achieving highly in my mid-term exams in three weeks. It's really important that I do well in these exams (especially for maths) as they determine what subjects I can do next year and furthermore what I can do in university and for the rest of my life. Kind of a big deal.

 

Speaking of university, I still have no idea what I want to do as a career. I've always been above average in all of my subjects but lately I've been verging on average for math and we all know that math is a massive deal in life. If you don't do well in maths, you're in trouble. Not that I'm complaining or anything. I mean so many people would kill to have the life I have and would kill to do as well in my subjects as I do but I just guess I have very high standards as I've always been very intelligent so that makes things a bit more stressful when you're starting to do worse at one of the peak times of your education.

 

But I still have the problem of what I'm going to after school. I mean, I could go into law or science or medicine but I don't want to live a mainstream life and I certainly don't want to be stuck with a boring job that I dread every day of my life. I want my job to not be a job. I want a job where I'm excited to start the day or I have fun during the day and it feels like I'm just doing what I love everyday of my life. Unfortunately, for that to happen, I need to first figure out what I love doing and I haven't cracked that code yet.

 

I want to do something creative. Something that's different everyday. Something that doesn't stress me out. Something where I can just be free.

 

I just need to find it.

 

Hopefully one day it'll come to me and I'll realise what I've wanted to do my entire life and it'll just fit like a glove. But until that day, I'm stuck here, trying to pass my mid-terms and writing my thoughts and emotions on this blog that nobody has even heard of...yet.

 

xx Teen Blog 

 

 

Hey :)

Hey guys!

 

This is a blog. Thanks for reading it. This is my first post and I've never really done anything like this before. I just really need a place to rant my feelings and get everything off my chest so I thought that this would be a great place to start. Even if nobody even sees this, I'll just be glad to have a safe place to get all these crazy teenage feelings off my mind.

 

I should probably start by introducing myself...

 

(Unfortunately, I won't ever be posting anything about my identity because I feel like this is where I can be completely me and for that to happen, I think it would be easiest to keep that a secret.)

 

I am a 15 year old girl living in Perth, Western Australia. I go to a high school. I have heaps of great friends. I love it. I've recently found myself becoming more and more interested in beauty and fashion and hair and stuff and it really excites me. I'm also getting a lot more interested in arty, creative things like drama and photography so expect some occasional photos.

 

When I was younger, I never acted like this. I hated dresses and skirts, I never cared about my appearance and I was really into books and science. Now, it's like I'm a different person. I can't get enough of shopping and pampering myself and splurging on all kinds of girly things. (even though I still work hard at school. Of course ;) haha). I think, deep down, that side of me has always been there but because I was seen as a tomboyish kind of girl, I thought of that as my place in life and I had to act like that. I thought it was 'against the rules' to step outside of that barrier but when I moved schools just over a year ago, I realised who I really was and was able to unleash it and reinvent myself.

 

This blog is going to be a teen blog. Hence the title. Duh. I'm an idiot.

 

This is where a normal teenage girl is going to talk about normal teenage things and hopefully everyone reading this will relate. I'm just basically going to write things that are on my mind every so often (whether that be a couple days a week or every fortnight I'm not sure yet) and hope that people like it and we can discuss things together. Like a massive conjugation of normal teenagers talking about normal teenage things online.

 

Well, that's it for the first post I guess...

 

I'll speak to you soon,

 

xx Teen Blog